If you have known me any length of time, then you know TMD is a one-man show.  Yes!  I have help with research and masters.  However, it’s just me doing the casting and shipping.  You may also know that — like most of us — I have personal struggles.  Unfortunately, in my case, because I am the only ‘laborer’ around here, when I get caught in those struggles, they have an immediate and sometimes severe affect on TMD.  Well, we need to have a chat about my struggles.


I was supposed to release my next series of new products for Takom’s M3 Lee/Grant kits two weeks ago.  Then I moved the release date to this weekend.  Well, I know some of you will be disappointed with me, but I am going to move the release to January 26. Now let me tell you why.


There are three things I wish I could change about myself, and they are all related.  In fact, they tend to feed each other until I wake up one day and find I have dug myself into a big hole again.  When that happens, I start feeling like I should just give up and quit.  I have had to be very careful to watch this since I took TMD back.  SO far, I’ve managed to avoid this cycle — but just barely.  Now I think I am closer to the edge since the last time I fell over it.  You may remember the last time.  I ended up selling TMD to my brother and walking away.

First, I struggle with several personal distractions that, if I am not very careful, get me in trouble with TMD.  First, I ah a modeler’s version of ADD: I am interested in W-A-Y too many things.  As a result, I can easily find my attention torn between so many subjects that I lose focus on the one thing that pays my bills: 1/35 scale armor!

Second, I have a bad habit of making promises without thinking.  This is actually one of my worse traits.  It is borne from a sincere desire to serve others and make them happy.  Unfortunately, it usually ends up in disappointing people instead.  This is why I pushed the M3 Lee releases back again.  I have been starting to put pressure on myself by making promises I haven’t been able to keep.

Finally, I hate stupidity, hypocrisy and failure — especially in myself.  I can overlook and easily forgive it in others, but not myself.  So, when the pressure to keep up with the things I have stupidly placed on myself starts to make me see myself as being stupid, and a hypocrite and — worse of all — making me fail you, my customer, I start in a downward emotional spiral that makes me want to quit and walk away.  Yes, it is partially self-pity.  No, it is not depression, at least, not in the serious form with which so many of my friends struggle.  I’d never suggest such a thing.  But it is also borne of a sincere desire and drive to do more than I should try to do.  And that is what leads to failure: because I cannot do everything I promise.

Well, I have been slowly sliding toward the edge of this personal abyss once again, and I do not want to fall over it.  Not again.


Now, I have grown a bit the past few years, but not much.  It’s been just enough to see the train coming at me and not much more.  Still, I have grown enough to see that I need to find ways to keep from putting pressure on myself — so that TMD stays fun for me and I stay in the game.  After spending the last two weeks thinking about how to do this, here is what I have decided to do, and in this order:

1 — Push back any new releases until the next regular new release date (Jan 26, 2018).

2 — Finish shipping the outstanding orders  from 2017.

3 — Handle all customer service issues remaining from 2018

4 — Answer all unanswered email.

5 — Set a work routine, where I cast and ship in the morning, master after lunch and handle administrative issues in the evening.

6 — Start working on those structural problems I have identified, like making the web site easier to use, building a more visible image for TMD on the internet and finding new pattern makers to help me expand TMD’s product line.

Naturally, all of this will take time and a great deal of effort.  I will need to keep focused and work on my self-discipline.  I’ll also need to find and accept help wherever I can find it.  You can help me with this.  If you think you see me slipping, let me know.  I’d prefer a private email, but if you think you need to call me out publicly, I get it.  I’ll do my best to accept such warnings as sincere attempts to help me stay on track.  If I can get myself to do all of this, and you help me watch myself, I think I can move away from the edge of my personal abyss and put TMD in a better position than it has ever been in — ever!  I hope you’ll help, or — at the very least — be patient with me while I fix TMD by fixing me 🙂


OK, enough listening to me blubber.  Go have fun and, until next time, stay safe and try to build something (preferably something using TMD resin).



6 responses to “2018.1.6 UPDATE: DELAYS AND CONFESSIONS

  1. Okie dokie, something to wait for . No biggie, you have the decision to make and frankly most of us are still figuring out what we’re doing . So, the push back is logical . After all, you laid out the business reasons why , The fixes are intertwined so that’s a given .
    You’re getting your works in progress solidified and directed. So, pushing back three weeks is sound strategy .
    With luck I might have the Quad.50 ready before 2058 .

  2. Karl Van Sweden

    Am there and doing that myself Joe. I had to walk away from my bench for the last week after barely being there fro the weeks before. I just got tired of it and felt like selling everything and giving up on models. Does sound familiar doesn’t it. Ah well, like you I have grown over the years and know better than giving into that temptation. God help us both to get over this hump. Just keep the faith and it will work in the end.

  3. John Rosengrant

    Joe as one of your customers which sincerely loves the work you produce , just take it one day at a time and please keep on keeping on.
    As a fellow artist in a very intense business always remember to keep it fun , it’s the only thing that gets you through the tough times

    • Thanks, John.

      That means a lot. I appreciate all the support I get from you guys, but when it comes from people who have done the same thing I do (especially when I admire them and their work),… Well, it’s special. So thanks 🙂

  4. There is no doubt in my mind that the modeling community as a whole really appreciates the quality of your products and the dedication you have to the hobby! I personally love your products and your down to earth manor (What you see is what you get)! Thank you for your hard work and I look forward to your next release (whenever that may come) because the wait (sort of like giving birth) will be well worth it. Happy casting!

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